2020 FBA Season/20.04.1
| Wednesday, April 1 | |||||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| BGR | 
|
64 | |||
| ALB | 
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80 | W | 
| |
| PLY | 
|
108 | |||
| QNS | 
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113 | W |
| |
| BAL | 
|
4 | |||
| WIL | 
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5 | W |
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| PIT | 
|
21 | W | ||
| LOR | 
|
17 |
| ||
| TEN | 
|
1 | W | ||
| TAL | 
|
0 |
| ||
| HNT | 
|
W | |||
| BLV | 
|
W |
| ||
| Previous Day | Next Day | ||||
Bangor Tides @ Albany Alphas
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Arena: Farigami Park - Albany, NY Player of the Game: Pura Doris Quaatsch (Zebra, G) - 26 pts, 1 reb, 2 ast, 2 stl |
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Confusion broke out in Albany today when Lance Wildfyre arrived to the stadium convinced he was still playing for the Albany Alphas. No amount of reasoning could dissuade the veteran from this belief, so officials decided that Bangor's players would don Alphas' jerseys and Albany would be in Bangor Blue.
Despite initial confusion where fans did not know which teams to route for, the event normalized until the second quarter, when Narkissa Kassius and Terry O'Toole started to tag-team wrestle Tia Terra and Randy Mackenbach in the middle of the court, while the rest of the game continued to play, completely unaware of the kerfuffle occurring.
While they were being separated, Tori Wetmore, Takeru Ishijima and Diego Imperio began to recite Shakespeare to the officials, and convinced that there needed to be a "halftime show," Ash Van Zant and Desdemona Iverson performed an impromptu singalong of a Beauty and the Beast medley, somehow procuring a guitar and keyboard, with "special guest Gaston Tutor" reprising the obvious role of Belle.
The game was called a draw and rescheduled, after which all players' psychological and physiological states were assessed. After several players were determined to be suffering from hypoxia, the stadium ventilation system was tested and discovered to be emitting high levels of CO2 at floor-level. All players have since recovered.
POTG Pura Doris Quaatsch was the only individual who seemed unaffected. "I just kept playing until they said to stop, that's our job, right?"
Plymouth Taproots @ Queens Pride
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Arena: Rucker Stadium - Queens, NY Player of the Game: Kinny DeMarcus (Hairy Bush Viper, G) - 25 pts, 4 reb, 12 ast, 2 blk |
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The Queens Pride security team received an anonymous tip that a magical hex would be placed on the stadium if certain demands were not met. Originating from a self-proclaimed "Wizard," - the threat wasn't taken seriously until Amelia Odessa Spring went for a layup and just continued to rise up out of the air, surprised. Other players started to change, their legs replaced by long tails which blended perfectly in color with their fur.
Kinny DeMarcus and Aurora Goldshine, however, ended up growing legs, losing the length of their bodies, to be replaced by fauns' legs.
Both teams agreed to continue the game, not letting something like "a little magical hex" affect their deep-seeded rivalry.
The game ended a few minutes early when Jake Turner started to change, effectively taking up the whole court with his tail, forcing everyone else into the locker rooms to sort themselves out.
"Well, my boyfriend's definitely going to be happy he's no longer the longer of the two of us in our relationship," Trevor Cruz quipped, before slithering off into the locker room.
Luther Kierkegaard seemed thrilled that he was able to use his body to spell out letters. "THIS IS ABSOLUTELY GREAT"
"So this is what it's like to walk," DeMarcus commented after the game, springing back and forth on his hooves almost gleefully, as if he had had them all his life. Goldshine also commented, "I wanted to see more representation from snakes in the league, but not like this. I mean, I'll take what I can get, but this definitely wasn't what I had in mind."
Baltimore Spirits @ Williamsburg Minutemen
| INNING | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | FINAL |
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| BAL | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 |
| WIL | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 5 |
Vera La Tiérra sprinted home from first base on a Rodger Umaechi single in the bottom of the ninth inning to lead the Williamsburg Minutemen past the visiting Baltimore Spirits 5-4 in each team's season finale Sunday.
La Tiérra's mad dash after the ball deflected off shortstop Gary Elsinore and into right field helped the Minutemen avoid a three-game sweep. Spirits right fielder Harrison York appeared to not take note of La Tiérra running home on the play, allowing her to score easily on the slide.
An inning prior, York had robbed Mikaylah Marley of what would have been a go-ahead two-run home run with an incredible leaping grab in right that saw York roll over the top of the bullpen wall after making the catch.
Despite the win, Williamsburg was unable to hold onto a 4-3 lead taken in the seventh inning that would have made a 20-game winner out of Renee Fiora. Timothy Svengaard served up a game-tying single to Erik Toivonen in the eighth inning.
Todd Hu earned the victory by striking out the side in the top of the ninth. João-Miguel Tavares suffered the loss for the Spirits. In the seventh, Lucas Berger-Kane snapped a 3-3 tie with an RBI single that drove home Umaechi who had just doubled for his 200th hit on the season. Umaechi finished the game with three hits and 201 total to cap a breakout year.
Fiora pitched seven innings, giving up three runs on four hits and two walks with eight strikeouts. She threw 115 pitches as she sought to become the first Minutemen left-hander to win 20 games since Zak Pejovic in 1953.
Williamsburg trailed 3-2 when it loaded the bases with no outs in the sixth inning. Chantal Magnano knotted the score with an RBI single, but the team couldn't take the lead then.
Baltimore first broke through with a three-run third inning, and Williamsburg answered with two in the bottom of the frame. Jerome N. Swimmer started for the Spirits and went five innings, surrendering three runs (two earned) on five hits and a walk. He struck out six.
Pittsburgh Keystones @ Lorain Firestorm
Keystones 21, Firestorm 17
Though this game finished with a four-point margin, the Keystones dominated for most of the afternoon. They were able to generate more than 250 net yards against Lorain's poor-tackling defense in the opening half alone. Meanwhile, Lorain's offense couldn't get anything going because Alyssia Silverman was under constant heavy pressure behind her miserable offensive line. Silverman didn't even complete her first pass until the 10-minute mark of the third quarter! Based on how Pittsburgh's dominated this affair, the team should have been up by three, maybe even four touchdowns in the third quarter.
And yet, the Keystones were leading by just 14 because of some mistakes. For instance, Craig Reinhardt fumbled in the red zone when the Keystones were up 11-0. Later, Garland Kaye Ulysses overthrew a wide-open Tyrone Gale. Ulysses then fired a horrible interception, which finally breathed some life into the Firestorm. Lorain was able to turn that give-away into a touchdown, cutting the margin to seven. The Firestorm were able to gain momentum and finally move the chains against a tired Pittsburgh defense. They even eventually had the lead, 17-14, but Ulysses was able to engineer a 78-yard scoring drive that clinched the victory for Pittsburgh.
Ulysses had a mixed performance, going 23-of-36 for 243 yards, one touchdown and an interception. He had some nice moments in the clutch and was able to even improvise well on one instance, as he tripped over his running back's feet, grabbed a loose ball, got up off his feet, avoided pressure and found Shirley Takamoto for a 3-yard completion. This was one play after Ulysses spun away from a potential sack to connect with another tight end for a decent gain. Conversely, Ulysses made some blunders that I referenced earlier. This isn't a surprise, considering that the very raw Ulysses is still developing. He'll need to be way more consistent for the Keystones to have a chance to upset Bangor next week. Ulysses's sole score was thrown to rookie tight end Ned Pritchard (3-67), who had the key, 49-yard reception on the decisive drive. Pritchard caught a deep pass and broke out of a couple of tackles to set up the Keystones deep in Lorain territory. Christiaan Hengst (4-51) didn't have as good of a game as expected, while Margo Warrior hauled in eight of her 10 targets for 48 yards.
With Elisa Lawless out, Whitney Hawkins handled two-thirds of the rushing workload. She gained 76 yards and a touchdown on 14 carries, while Reinhardt tallied 30 yards on eight tries. Reinhardt, as mentioned, nearly ended up costing Pittsburgh a victory. While Silverman didn't complete a pass in the first 19 minutes of this game, she ended up 20-of-36 for 249 yards, one touchdown and a pair of interceptions, one of which was a desperate attempt at the end of the game. Don't blame Silverman for the loss, though. Not only did her offensive line offer her zero protection; her receivers killed her with some drops.
One Lorain player who had multiple drops was Danica Magnano. The speedy receiver thrived in his first two games, but struggled in this contest. She caught two passes for 22 yards and killed his team with drops, including one on third down. Elsewhere in the Lorain receiving corps, Akiak Pratt saw tight coverage and had just one catch for minus-3 yards in the opening half. However, he was able to finish with six grabs for 67 yards.
Edwin Griega apologized to his fans for not producing ahead of this game, so he was able to respond with a solid performance. Griega’s rushing yardage doesn't stand out - 15 carries, 61 yards - but that was impressive because Lorain’s offensive line couldn't open up anything for him. Griega helped his fantasy owners with a receiving touchdown. At the end of the game, James Frestrikial asked, “I thought we were supposed to be playing basketball today?”
Tennessee Moonshiners @ Tallahassee Typhoons
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Arena: Merrill Palace - Tallahassee, FL Player of the Game: Tryce Peter Mallark (Gelada Baboon, F) - 1 pts, 0 reb, 0 ast, 0 stl |
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The game between Tennessee and Tallahassee was postponed due to a private function at Merrill Palace, but no one ever bothered to inform the players, staff, or officials. Instead, they arrived to discover a speed-dating event taking place in the main concourse.
Most of the players took the error in stride, even getting in on the action. Apiatan Redmane's pink hair was the hit of the night, and many non-sports fans assumed it was a wig worn for the occasion, and wanted to know where they could pick one up for themselves, happily discovering the gift shop did sell them.
Merill Providence admitted his crush on Arther Selby, while Travis Buckner took the opportunity to plug his new dating consulting services, which he conveniently happened to have business cards for. Russell Savoy admitted "I've been looking for love in all the wrong places. It turns out, I just had to come to Tallahassee."
Tryce Peter Mallark grew bored of the situation, and stared shooting free throws on the main court. His first basket was sunk just as the game would have ended, and the game officials considered it to be "good enough" to count toward the win, realizing that there was no time to reschedule before the end of the season. A few local fans grew irate at the decision, but ultimately, there was too much love in the air for people to really get too upset.
Huntsville Mayors @ Biloxi Voodoo
(something something fat lion nasty tiger violence deer vs j-pop bird potato wolf smelly skunk thing)
(idk the original guy got tired of writing anything more so I'm taking over)
(i guess home team rules away team sux go blv)
(arsenal)
(???)
(profit)
(help I'm trapped in faded's basement sav